Pupil (on phone): My son has a bad cold and won't be able to come to school today.School Secretary: Who is this?Pupil: This is my father speaking!


Mother: How do you like your new teacher
?Son: I don't. She told me to sit up the front for the present and then she didn't give me one!


Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not?Son: I don't feel wellFather: Where don't you feel well?Son: In school!

What would happen if you took the school bus home?The police would make you bring it back!


Great news, teacher says we have a test today come rain or shine.So what's so great about that?It's snowing outside!